On the road again, I just can’t wait to get on the road again, the life I love is making music with my friends, and I can’t wait to get on the road again.
I want to yank Willie Nelson’s braids every time I hear that song. Or every time my husband sings it to me, elbowing me in the ribs cause he known it’s such a cliche and he wants to see my eyes roll.
I’ve got a good man, a great father who is sometimes more tender and nurturing to our kids than me, and he is a lover to me in a million ways. But even he can’t help but sing when it’s time to hit the road again for a tour. There’s nothing he loves more than his music tours. He is dancing around the house as he stuffs clothes into a suitcase. He’s tickling the kids; he’s flirting with me. He’s cleaning out gutters and tightening up door hinges. He’s never more attentive than the day before he leaves for tour. I can’t stand that. I want to be distant. I want to pout. I want to scream, But what about ME!!!?? Where’s my adventure? Where’s my road?
The kids and I stand at the top of the driveway and wave goodbye as he drives away. I feel like a giant cliche. Did he remember every piece of equipment? Did he pack his guitar? He won’t eat anything on the road today but sunflower seeds, I’ll bet you. I shake my head. I have to let him do this his way or it doesn’t work. I hustle the kids into shoes for the hundredth time this week by myself. On the fifth morning he’s gone I wake up just knowing he played a killer show last night. I can feel it. I can’t wait to talk to him. I take familiar rights and lefts in my neighborhood. The kids bicker in the backseat. But there’s a good song playing on the radio, and it gets me thinking. If there’s a reason to parent alone sometimes, to shoulder more, to be taxed harder for the sake of your spouse, than this is the one I can live with. This reason. I turn down our street. I’ll let the kids eat cereal for dinner. Then I’ll call him. I hope his show tonight is incredible. I hope he banks. I hope he floors the audience. I hope his music wakes them from their stupor, so that they be forever changed.